Sunday, December 25, 2011

feeling full and thankful

thankful that I don't have to get up tomorrow morning
thankful for ski trips and scratch tickets
thankful for the cold that waited til christmas
thankful that it is going to take at least five days to see all my people
thankful for christmas dinner, and ricotta pie
thankful for the last two inches I have on my baby brother
thankful for long drives by myself so I can finally belt one out
thankful that my house smells like home
thankful for the darkness and the quiet

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

Friday, December 23, 2011

victory shrimp

For months my grade-level partner and I have talked about how on the last day of school before break we would get ourselves some shrimp from Captain Somethingorother's to celebrate our survival. If we made it.

Now here I am. Eating my shrimp. Maybe it doesn't seem like that big of a deal -- for some people the first few months of teaching are a small fraction of the amount of time that they will spend in the classroom. Regardless, the past few months have easily been the most difficult thing I have ever done. Not because there have been massive everyday challenges, but because as a teacher you are expected to keep an even pace no matter what happens, and its exhausting.

At first, you're flying. High on adrenaline. Like this.


Then you start to wear down. Like this.


Next comes the anger. Pure bitterness. Like this.


But, finallyfinally you get here.

According to some, I have proved myself by lasting this long, but my goal in the new year is to stop just surviving. I have a classroom full of 21 beautiful little people, and we all need to enjoy that together. I want to make every day positive, not tolerable. I want to stop raising my voice. I want to cash in on the months and months of community building.

Before all that, though, I'm going to get some sleep.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Reason #699

One teacher per room is not enough.

I realize that schools cannot always afford to put a full-time aide in every room, and that not all teachers want another person in their room. However, when two people understand each other and enter a room with the same goals, the same priorities, it is a beautiful thing.

Today I was lucky enough to have one of the best aides in the building in my room for the literacy block. She did two guided reading groups while I worked with students one-on-one. She cut things and stapled things (tasks I normally do at home or during my prep). I cannot say enough what an enormous difference it made in my room. Everyone was more on task. Everyone was more accountable. Sixteen children got specialized attention in just an hour.

The amount of learning that happened this morning, one day before the break -- Christmas Eve Eve Eve no less -- is a testament to the fact that every teacher should have help.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

holiday breakfast

Yesterday, we had a special holiday breakfast when everyone got to school. Students and teachers were asked to dress up, and we all ate salty bacon to our heart's content.


My favorite moment happened first thing. B raised her hand.

"Ms. Haley, who are you dressed as? Why are you wearing a tie?"

"I'm not dressed as anyone, B. These are my fancy clothes."

"For real?"

"Yes, for real."

2.5

I am literally at the exact halfway point in my week.

I woke up this morning with an awful cold. Somebody literally had to coax me out of bed. Ms. R just came to check on me, because apparently I look sick from a distance..


The good news? We have staff team building in the form of a basketball game today, so I got to wear yoga pants to work.

Monday, December 19, 2011

outdoor recess

I am not happy about global warming, but I am thankful that my kiddies are playing outside today while I sit quietly in my room.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

can't sleep

I'm too excited.

Only 20 bathroom breaks stand between me and vacation.

Friday, December 16, 2011

on the bus

We're on our way back from our field trip, J is passed out behind me. A  and I are playing "the silent game." I guess it's not really fair that I have a phone, but I am kicking his butt. Right now he's making funny faces while barely keeping his eyes open.

Winner gets a penny from my wallet.

field trip all morning

And when it is over, I will be able to count the days on ONE hand.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

our tiny tree

in the words of a fellow teacher

THIS WEEK MUST END.

If I were a poor black kid...

An article posted by Forbes today, in which the white male author acknowledges his privilege and then goes on to say that that if you are poor and black, you just need to work harder.

Perhaps you caught me on the wrong day, perhaps I'm just procrastinating because I don't want to write my lesson plans, but excuse me? I appreciate that this man is thinking about poverty, and perhaps even feeling a little guilty about his privilege, but this isn't about you making yourself (and other people like you) feel better about the advantages you received.


First, before you say one word about what "poor black kids" should do, why don't you have a look at what some of them actually do. Not the collective, generalized "they," but the people who have actual challenges because they are minority children living in poverty in the U.S.

My children get up way before the sun every day to commute from all kinds of places because their families want them to have a better education and enrolled them in a charter school. My kids start their day, if they make it to school on time, eating a breakfast  provided by the USDA (I'll let you use your imagination, but I can tell you it's nothing like what mom makes) in a noisy cafeteria. My kids spend 8 hours at school, where they are surrounded by the uneasy chaos that comes with an under-resourced, under-staffed school. School is not as stable, comforting, or structured as it should be. They get almost no time to grow emotionally, to play, or to feel supported because we are too worried about walking in straight lines and sitting in ready position. Some of them go to after school programs. And not the kind where you make crafts and have snack.

Many of my kids get picked up by different people every day because parents can't afford childcare. They tell me things that happen at home and my heart sinks. My uncle was shot... The other day I was riding a bus with my mommy and a man had a gun... Yesterday I was absent because we had to go to my baby sister's funeral... Never mind what the stress of poverty and poor nutrition does to a child's brain chemically and psychologically. Never mind that I am talking about 5-year-olds who still have twelve years of this to go before they are college-aged.

The last time I checked every poor black kid I know was working their tiny little self pretty hard just to stay afloat. They do the best they can every day, and no one has any right to tell them that they need to do more, that they are lazy.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

day 75

"So if the small hand is pointing to the 5 and the big hand is pointing to the 12, what time is it?"

"When I was a baby I used to think walls were made of gold. And I would stick magnets on my head."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, like a girl."
"Ms. Haley, it's my nose. Whenever I try to smell... I can't."

single digits.

There are 9 days left until break.

I need to start wrapping their presents!

Monday, December 12, 2011

spills

Lately, I have been a magnet for all things dirty. The first grader who lost her breakfast. Chocolate milk in transit from the table to the trash. All kinds of blood.

How is it that I have been teaching for three months and now all of the sudden I can't wear my pants twice?

Sunday, December 11, 2011

my first teacher gift


Yes, that is a pile of construction paper with a red bow on top. If only K was old enough to understand the irony -- no one did provide construction paper at the beginning of the year.

Now, how to regift it to her so I keep getting colorful handwritten notes?

Friday, December 09, 2011

it's beginning to feel a lot like christmas

Everyone said they would crazy before Christmas. I was warned.

But I just keep thinking to myself, WE STILL HAVE TWO WEEKS. If they are like this now, what are they going to be like on the 23rd?

Deep breath.

Thursday, December 08, 2011

funded.

We just evacuated the building for a potential gas leak. During my prep. Which means that I have not had one second to breathe since forever ago. I let them have a few minutes of extra recess so that I could actually breathe, and when I just checked my email:


I really needed that today. Thank you all, so very much.

Wednesday, December 07, 2011

SPARK


This is exactly where you should enter the code to double your money. When you enter this code it triggers a matching donation from Donors Choose.

We are so close! Only $196 (or $98 if donors enter the code SPARK at checkout) left to raise!!

so close!

We have $226 dollars left to go... or $113, if everyone enters the code to double their donation.

With $8 (and the SPARK doubling code at checkout), you could purchase an entire literacy center for us. Even if you can only give a little bit, we appreciate your help!

Let's do this.

Tuesday, December 06, 2011

only $525 to go!

If we get roughly another $275 this week our project will be fully funded! Please help out if you can! We might even get the materials before Christmas.

Go to this link and enter SPARK.

And thank you Wellesley. I see you out there, supporting the literacy.

smells

"Ms. Haley! Ms. Haley! Every time we come down to lunch, I smell something."

-Mr. J

Monday, December 05, 2011

off to an excellent start!

We already have 3 donations! Thank you so much.

Please keep in mind that the matching offer is a limited time event. Don't wait! Help The Land of I Can today!

Yes We Can Read Like First Graders!

Finally, here it is! Click on this link to go straight to my project and donate.

Important: During the checkout process, you must enter this code in order to double your money. The code is SPARK.

Don't wait!! DonorsChoose will only match up to $250k. If you are thinking of donating, the sooner the safer!

countdown is on...

In just THREE short hours I will post both my DonorsChoose project and the code that you can enter to get double your money! For this week only they have agreed to match every donation from family and friends dollar for dollar.

Check back soon!

Thursday, December 01, 2011

surprise visitor tomorrow

We are having an extra special all-day visit tomorrow from Ms. J. I told them she is coming because they are the smartest Kindergartners in the whole city.

When a visitor came today, I told them the same thing. When I said, "you're practically famous," their eyes all lit up.

Five-year-olds are the best.

words

It's quiet time, and I just looked over at A with his head down, eyes closed, and realized how far we have come.

A couple of months ago every single day was a face-off. During quiet time, he would instantly begin to cry -- loudly. Eventually, I could get him to sit in his seat quietly, but he refused to close his eyes. If I asked him to close them he would scream and wake everyone up. I could never decide if it was better for me to get him to follow the rules, or to have quiet during quiet time. He had absolutely no skills for expressing what he needed or wanted, so he would simply cry all day long.

Today, someone upset him and he began to cry. All I had to say was, "use your words." He stopped crying and told me what had happened. I'm so proud of him.

Something that amazes me about teaching is how dynamic some of my relationships are with my kids. I need to supply constant care and growth in order to for them to remain positive. Sometimes my children need all of the support, scaffolding, love, and nurturing I can muster. Sometimes they need very little. For A, it's a hug first thing in the morning, a thumbs up at some point in the afternoon, and a little tough love.